Do you ever just feel empty. Not sad, just more like a void of suck which consumes things.
I have no idea why I'm here. Why do I sit in front of a computer, blogging to people I don't know about the strange feelings I get?
Where does this leave me?
Sometimes I feel like I blame circumstance too much. Maybe I should just start blaming myself? Surely it can't be someone else's fault.
The truth is, I let myself down every single day of my life, and I'm just too stupid to accept it. I cover my own failures with bad jokes, loud music and over enthusiastic dancing.
Do you ever just want to scream really loud?
I don't want to alarm my neighbours, but I've had this scream building up in my throat for days and I just can't shake it.
Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever sort out my life.
I often think about the future.
Will I be happy when I pick my own subjects?
Will I be happy when I graduate?
Will I be happy when I move out?
I don't even really know when I'm happy anymore or when I'm just faking it for my own sake. My parents don't know how I really feel and my friends would just think it's a cry for attention
Which it probably is anyway.
I'm self centred and egotistical and I just don't want to admit it
Why do I always feel so empty? Happiness is only ever fleeting and I want to break free from this mentality but I don't want to draw attention to myself. I guess I'll just stick to inwardly keeping everything in until I break once again.
At least then I won't embarrass myself in front of other people again.
